Dating zone unicorn

Man Claims To Have Finally Cracked The Dating Code In One Questionable Chart

Dana Mclendon has lived on this earth for 46 years and allegedly cracked the one universal algorithm no man has been able to figure out before: women.

In a video by Tactical Response, he demonstrates the solved algorithm by a sexist mathematical chart. The chart contains two axis', showing that as a woman's hotness level goes up, so does her level of crazy. In other words, he recreated a fancier grown-up version of the juvenile "rating" game.

Just when we think we understand his formula (sadly), he throws us for a loop by claiming women too high on the hotness scale enter guys into what is called the "danger zone." Because women that are incredibly beautiful are automatic sociopaths, of course.

But we have to give him some credit. He creates a chart for guys too (see below), in which the axis' compare a guy's looks to the amount of money he has. Which is valid, considering that'd be the only explanation for someone dating this guy.

However, we did find the "wife zone" and "unicorn zone" to be completely valid. Your WIFE should be hot in your eyes. And always chase after that unicorn.

As for the rest, thanks but no thanks, Dana. We'll stick with Tinder.

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The Last Unicorn (film)

Box office

The Last Unicorn is a 1982 American animated fantasy film directed by Jules Bass and Arthur Rankin, Jr. and featuring the voices of Alan Arkin. Jeff Bridges. and Mia Farrow as the Unicorn. The film was produced by Rankin/Bass for ITC Entertainment. and animated by Topcraft. Based on the novel The Last Unicorn written by Peter S. Beagle. who also wrote the film's screenplay, the film is about a unicorn who, upon learning that she is the last unicorn in the world, goes on a quest to find out what has happened to the others of her kind.

Contents

Plot [ edit ]

In an enchanted forest, a unicorn learns she is the last of her kind; a butterfly reveals that a demonic animal called the Red Bull herded her kind to the ends of the earth. Venturing into unfamiliar territory beyond the safety of her home, the Unicorn journeys to find them and bring them back.

The Unicorn is captured by the witch Mommy Fortuna, and is put on display in the witch's Midnight Carnival. She makes friends with Schmendrick, an incompetent magician under the services of Mommy Fortuna. While most of the attractions are normal animals with a spell of illusion placed on them (like a Manticore being a toothless lion, a Satyr being a crippled chimpanzee, and the "Midgard Serpent " being a mere snake ), Fortuna has also captured the immortal harpy Celaeno as well. With the help of Schmendrick, the Unicorn escapes, and in the process frees Celaeno, who kills Fortuna and her henchman Ruhk. The Unicorn and the wizard later gain a second traveling companion, Molly Grue, the careworn lover of bandit leader Captain Cully.

When the Unicorn nears the seaside castle of King Haggard, supposed keeper of the Red Bull, she encounters the animal, which turns out to be a monstrous fire elemental. At the last moment before her capture, Schmendrick's unpredictable magic transforms her into a human woman with white knee-length hair. In this guise the Red Bull is uninterested in her and departs. The Unicorn suffers tremendous shock at the feeling of mortality in her body. While Molly wraps the Unicorn's human form in a blanket, Schmendrick states that the magic chose the form and not he and promises that he will return her to normal after the quest is complete.

Schmendrick, Molly Grue and the now-human Unicorn proceed to King Haggard's castle. Haggard is at first unwelcoming, and Schmendrick introduces the Unicorn as his niece, Lady Amalthea. Schmendrick requests that the three of them stay there as members of Haggard's court, only to be told that the only occupants of the castle are Haggard, his adopted son Prince Lir and four ancient men-at-arms. Haggard consents to lodging the trio, replacing his more competent on-call wizard, Mabruk, with Schmendrick, and setting Molly Grue to work in his scullery .

Amalthea begins to forget her identity and her reasons for coming to the castle, and falls in love with Prince Lir. Caught in her newfound emotions, she struggles with thoughts of abandoning her quest for the sake of mortal love. Haggard confronts Amalthea in private conversation, hinting at the location of the unicorns, yet from the waning magic in her eyes, he has doubts regarding his previous suspicions that she is more than she seems. Molly learns the location of the Red Bull's lair from a talking cat.

Molly, Schmendrick and Amalthea are joined by Lir as they enter the bull's den. Schmendrick reveals Amalthea's true identity to Lir after explaining what they are looking for. Lir is unmoved and says that he loves her anyway. This makes Amalthea want to abandon the quest and marry Lir, but Lir dissuades her. The Red Bull appears, but is no longer deceived by Amalthea's human form and chases after her. As Lir struggles to protect her, Schmendrick turns Amalthea back into the Unicorn, but she is unwilling to leave Lir's side. The Bull drives her toward the ocean, just as he earlier drove all the other unicorns, but she manages to run away and the Red Bull gives chase. Lir tries to defend her, but is killed by the bull. Enraged, the Unicorn turns on the Bull and forces him into the sea. Carried on the white surf of incoming tides, the other unicorns emerge en masse from the water, causing Haggard's castle to collapse into the sea as they rush past, with Haggard falling to his death.

On the beach, the Unicorn magically revives Lir before departing for her forest. Schmendrick assures Lir that he has gained much by winning the love of a unicorn, even if he is now alone. The Unicorn briefly returns to say goodbye to Schmendrick, who laments that he has done her wrong by burdening her with regret and the taint of mortality. She disagrees and thanks him for having helped to restore unicorns to the world; though she is the only unicorn to feel regret, she is also the only unicorn to know love. Schmendrick and Molly watch the Unicorn depart for her home in the woods.

Cast [ edit ]

Mia Farrow as the Unicorn / Lady Amalthea, the titular "last unicorn" who, in her search for the other unicorns, is transformed into a young woman and learns about regret and love.

Alan Arkin as Schmendrick, a magician who accompanies the Unicorn on her quest to find others like her. Beagle commented that he was a bit "disappointed" by the way Alan Arkin approached the character because it seemed "too flat". [ 3 ]

Jeff Bridges as Prince Lir, King Haggard's adopted son who falls in love with Lady Amalthea. Although he is later told by Schmendrick that she is a unicorn, his feelings for her remain.

Tammy Grimes as Molly Grue, the love of Captain Cully who joins Schmendrick and the Unicorn. While explaining that there was no particular reason that he did not write a detailed background for Molly Grue's character, Peter S. Beagle stated that he has "always been grateful" to Grimes because she "brought such vocal life to the character that she covered things I didn't do." [ 3 ]

Robert Klein as The Butterfly, the creature that gives the Unicorn hints as to where to find the other unicorns.

Angela Lansbury as Mommy Fortuna, a witch who uses her illusory magic to run the Midnight Carnival, which showcases mythical creatures that are, in truth, just normal animals. Later, the harpy Celaeno, one of the two real mythical creatures, kills her and her henchman, Ruhk.

Christopher Lee as King Haggard, the ruler of a dreary kingdom who has never been happy, save for when he looks at unicorns. Beagle described Lee as "the last of the great 19th Century actors, and either the most-literate or second-most literate performer I've ever met." [ 4 ] When Lee came in to work, he brought his own copy of the novel wherein he took note of lines that he believed should not be omitted. [ 5 ] Lee, who is fluent in German. also voiced King Haggard in the German dub of the film.

Keenan Wynn as The Harpy Celaeno. a real harpy that was captured by Mommy Fortuna, freed by the Unicorn, and kills Mommy Fortuna and Ruhk out of vengeance for trapping her, the Unicorn and the other animals

Wynn also voices Captain Cully, the leader of a group of bandits.

Paul Frees as Mabruk, King Haggard's court magician who is replaced by Schmendrick.

Rene Auberjonois as the Skull that guards the clock that serves as an entryway into the Red Bull's lair. Beagle praised Auberjonois' performance, saying "he could have played any role in that movie and I would have been happy. He's that talented." [ 4 ]

Brother Theodore as Ruhk, a hunchback who works for Mommy Fortuna. He, along with Mommy Fortuna, is killed by the Harpy Celaeno.

Don Messick as the Cat that gives Molly Grue clues regarding the whereabouts of the Red Bull's lair.

Nellie Bellflower as the Tree that speaks and falls in love with Schmendrick after he accidentally casts the wrong spell on it.

Edward Peck as Jack Jingly, Cully's Men

Jack Lester as Hunter #1, Old Farmer, Cully's Men

Kenneth Jennings as Hunter #2, Cully's Men

Production [ edit ]

Peter S. Beagle stated that there had been interest in creating a film based on the book "early on". Those who expressed interest included Lee Mendelson and Bill Melendez. though Beagle had been convinced by one of their partners' wives that they were "not good enough", and former 20th Century Fox animator Les Goldman. At the time, Beagle believed that "animated was the only way to go" with regard to the film, and had never thought of making it into a live-action film. Rankin/Bass had been the last studio that the film's associate producer, Michael Chase Walker, approached, and Beagle was "horrified" when he was informed that they had made a deal with Walker. Beagle stated that he has "…come to feel that the film is actually a good deal more than I had originally credited", and went on to say "There is some lovely design work – the Japanese artists who did the concepts and coloring were very good. And the voice actors do a superb job in bringing my characters to life…" [ 3 ]

While Rankin/Bass provided the film's dialogue and story based on Beagle's work, the animation was done by the studio Topcraft. The studio was later hired by Hayao Miyazaki to work on Nausicaa of the Valley of the Wind . and their core members eventually went on to form Studio Ghibli. [ 6 ] According to Beagle, the final film ended up being "remarkably close" to his original script, although one scene at the end involving an encounter with a princess was "animated but eventually cut." [ 3 ]

David Says

I’ve known a number of men and women who’ve stepped into couples’ relationships for a night or longer, and their experiences range everywhere from amazing to ehh to terrifying. Unicorns are definitely out there–some will actively identify as unicorns, and some bi or straight women will be interested if the right situation comes along in the right way–but most won’t advertise themselves.

I hear a lot of complaints from bi and lesbian women who are sick of heterosexual couples writing to them and asking if they want a third. I understand: they get treated as sexual objects to be used for others’ pleasure, not as real people.

Besides all the unwanted mail, there’s a good reason unicorns hide: you’re taking on very little risk yourself but asking them to do something very risky. If she sleeps with you, she will step into another relationship that’s already well-developed (could she ruin it? could you use her body? will you use her against each other?) and step into the bedrooms of people she doesn’t know well (will you respect her? will you treat her well? will you satisfy her sexually?).

If you’re going to find a third, you’ll have to be very cognizant of and attentive to her comfort with you and your situation. You’ll have to bend over backwards to make her feel like you two are stable, happy, healthy, and will be interested in making the experience safe and fun for her. That applies to everything from how you write your profile, to how you contact her, to whether you’re both interested in getting her off in bed.

You need to be really fucking suave. Like rico suave suave. Here’s what’s wrong with your approach so far:

Language matters . You need to get your language right to attract the right people. Are you open or polyamorous? They mean different things. Look them up, decide which applies to you, and use one of the two terms in your profile, not both. But the question of language goes beyond that. Make sure the grammar and spelling in your profile are spot-on so the potential unicorn understands you well. Don’t call women girls because many find it offensive and demeaning, especially sexually open women with bisexual tendencies who think a lot about gender and sex and power. Also, by using the right terminology, like the word unicorn, you might turn up in the right search results.

Use the power of women. Nothing makes women feel safe like other women. Your profile is listed as belonging to a man. The main photo is of an imposing, muscular, male back. The first three photos are of the male in your partnership. There are no photos of the two of you together. This will be off-putting to a lot of women. You should make his and hers profiles and link to each other. This will double your chances of being seen, and it will present the two of you in the most positive, open light. “Yeah, she’s real, she can vouch for this dude, and I can see her whole profile right here.”

I also think it will make it easier if you present as a bisexual woman who is in an open relationship. You might be able to smooth the way for your guy by meeting women by yourself first and then introducing your boyfriend if everyone is into the idea. And I sincerely hope that’s the case. This will be more fun for you and your unicorn if you’re truly going to be into her and not just doing this to please your boyfriend or to fulfill a curiosity. If you can connect with someone of truly shared sexual interests, that will make things easier, and if you, as the partnered woman, can be the organizer, you will likely have an easier time too.

Walk softly, but talk a lot. If you get to the point of meeting up with someone, start with dates in public spaces and create a safe, fun environment. Make sure she knows that’s the plan as well. Talk to each other and create a feeling of friendship and camaraderie before trying to take things to the next level. Right now, friendship seems like an afterthought in your profile, but a third will want to be sure she’s at least treated well. Make sure you’ve all had a chance to talk about your expectations for a first intimate encounter before it actually happens. This way everyone can feel good and you are more likely to get what you actually want. There are a lot of possibilities here, and you might need to ease into things. Maybe she watches you two together at first. Maybe you and she go at it while he watches. Maybe both of you focus on her only at first …

Sally Says

You’re already starting at a disadvantage because most single women aren’t looking for what you’re offering, and so many other couples are making the same ask. You have to convince those nice girls that it is really worth their getting to know you.

Tell a story that makes women feel safe. Your profile is kind of sparse, and you need to pull back on the sexual aggression. It doesn’t tell much of a story about who you are individually and together, how long you’ve been open (or poly?), why you’re seeking out a woman for a threesome, what you hope to get out of this as a couple, and what you can offer her that will be worth the effort.

You also need to think about what to say to the unicorns you do find. First messages on OKCupid are often deleted, so you need to make yours stand out. When you do message women, have a catchy opener, and answer some of these questions: What makes you two a good find for a unicorn on the hunt? How will you woo these ladies and make them feel good, special and safe? How will she know you’ll treat her well instead of using her for sex and leaving her unsatisfied, as some unicorns report? How will she know you’re both really into this and won’t freak out?

Pick Better Pics. Pictures are part of the story, so after you run a spell check, work on some classy pics. Selfies and muscle shots are not going to get you anywhere. Dress up nice and get a friend to take a photo of you two having fun together doing normal stuff, not half-naked in front of your unmade bed. You need to show that you are a nice normal couple who just happens to have one slightly unusual predilection.

Search Wider . Since unicorns are hard to find, you need to search everywhere. Ask yourselves where in your social circles you might be able to find someone who shares your interests. Do you know other couples that you might suspect (or know from conversation) are interested in the same activity you are? Could you negotiate a trade? Do you have an acquaintance who’s up for anything, and might say yes in the right situation? Already having a social connection would help to allay some of the fears that a third partner might rightfully feel about hooking up with y’all.

The Consensus

Unicorns are shy, timid creatures, and for good reason: everyone out there seems to want a piece of them to put in their sexual trophy case. Because threesomes are so common, the good news is that this kind of unicorn does exist. It’s not necessarily going to be as disappointing for you as it is for every little girl who wants her own horned, fuzzy horse as a child. If you don’t learn to think like a unicorn, however, you will never catch one.

The most important thing is that you have to really do the work to make your profile attractive to potential unicorns. You also have to master the art of making your online and in-person communications attractive. Consider all the crap that women who might be into this go through. Consider all the bad things they might be worried about. Tell a good, clear story about how fun, safe, and amazing you are, and rely on the woman among you to make things run smoothly.

Sally touched on the idea of seeking out other couples, and we both think that might be your best bet. Unicorns are super rare, but couples who want them are everywhere. A lot of straight couples are squeamish about seeking out other straight couples. Usually it’s the men in the relationship who feel this way. Even knowing there’s another penis in the mix feels “gay” or threatening, right? If you want your threesome, get over it. You don’t have to go at it all in a pile or even in the same room. You might have one of the women or men play unicorn for the other couple, however, and that way everyone gets what he and she wants without wasting time on the hunt or annoying thousands of bisexual women with unsolicited requests for orgies.

Текст видео

Опубликовано: 2 авг. 2014 г.

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This Amateur Einstein Has the Ladies All Figured Out

Unveiling his "Hot Crazy Matrix" to the world for the first time on YouTube, 46-year-old armchair sociologist and unsung American hero Dana McLendon just changed the dating game for men everywhere

Leave it to a 46-year-old suburban dad to crack the complex code that is womankind. Dana McLendon, a pistol-packing lawyer from Tennessee who gives off more of an algebra teacher vibe, appears in a YouTube video posted last week by Tactical Response CEO James Yeager, the defense-training expert best known for threatening to “start killing people” if the government tightened gun control laws. Calling upon all the wisdom he’s gained about women, dating and finding the one in his half-century on earth, McLendon outlines what he calls his “Universal Hot Crazy Matrix,” which is “everything a young man needs to know about women” summarized in one convenient infographic.

As much as we really wanted to hate it, we have to hand it to McLendon—though his chart pushes all the uncomfortable buttons in the politically incorrect, misogynistic ways you’d expect, it kind of works. As a female viewer, it’s sort of like being a redneck who likes Jeff Foxworthy. And the man has a gift for deadpan delivery.

McLendon’s matrix begins with his “hot” and “crazy” axis, with hot measured on the usual scale of one to 10 and crazy starting at four, “because of course there’s no such thing as a woman who is not at least a four crazy.” The “hot-crazy line” is drawn diagonally, dividing the grid into various quadrants of desirability, which he unpacks for viewers with the cold, hard logic of a pragmatist. McLendon advises that any woman below a five in hotness be automatically relegated to the “No Go Zone” because “life is better this way.”

“As a rule,” he says, “we do not date or marry women who are not at least, in our mind, a 5.”

he No Go Zone abuts the “Fun Zone,” which is reserved for women who fall below the crazy line and between five and eight on the hot scale. “You can hang out here and meet these girls and spend time with them,” McLendon says. “But keep in mind…you want to move out of the Fun Zone to a more permanent location.”

Above the Fun Zone is the “Danger Zone,” which is where you find your classic stage-four clingers. “This includes your redheads, your strippers, anyone named Tiffany and hair dressers,” he says. “This is where your car gets keyed, you get a bunny in the pot, you’re tires get slashed and you end up in jail.”

If You Have any Doubts check the links below:

Unicorn Dreaming

The last time I dreamt of unicorns I was teetering at the edge of the precipice of great change. The unicorns that appeared in my meditations and dreams were not the stereotypical white unicorn now depicted commonly in fantasy art, they were sand coloured ponies with black mane and tail emerging out of the desert sand of Central Australia – my holiday destination for 2005. These unicorns were playful and beautiful, they wanted to be known and shared but only now have I been able to speak of them. They invited me to paint them, to create healing cards featuring them and share them in any way I could with others. What followed my unicorn dreaming was a challenging but complete transformation on every level of my being.

When I choose to write a blog post about unicorn dreaming in response to a question posted as a comment on a previous post I realised that yet again I was moving toward that precipice facing a quantum leap to great change. There are never any coincidences of course. The necessary change had already been set in motion by goals I myself had set. Invoking unicorns to write this post was simply another part of that universal energy flowing in to assist the transition of consciousness.

Within myth and legend it is said that unicorns have miraculous healing powers and an inner light so beautiful that it turned the hearts of men towards cruelty and greed to obtain it forcing the unicorn to retreat from the physical plane into the etheric realms. It is also said that only those with an open and pure heart and mind will ever see the unicorn appear physically. Throughout history much has been said about the form of the unicorn. It may appear in the form of a goat, deer, rhinocerous or oryx. It is said to have cloven hooves that may or may not be heart shaped. The horn may be etched with a spiral pattern and appear silver, opalescent or with rainbow hues. However it appears in your dreams is significant to you. If it appears as a deer or a horse, also look at the qualities of these animals as well.

The unicorn appears to us to assist our journey upon the path of truth. If we choose to follow, it will lead us upon a sacred quest deep into our inner world where it guides us beyond the fearful thoughts that we have made to the truth and light buried beneath. Only there may we reach our higher consciousness and connect to the etheric realm where the unicorn resides alongside the fairies and devas. While it guides us upon the path that we all must travel, it also shows us how the path can be unique and personal to us.

The unicorn embodies Divine purity and gentleness but also great power and healing. It can open even the most tightly closed heart. In the Beastaries of the World the unicorn is recorded as having 3 qualities.

* it cannot be captured – although it delights in you trying

* it has a great love of solitude

* it has an indomitable spirit

Unicorn is also said to appear to the mother of a special child, having appeared to the mother of Confucius and is often depicted in Christian art with the mother of Jesus. This special child lies dormant within each of us. When one follow the unicorn and discovers its gifts, one also discovers the gifts within self. The unicorn will accompany us through the challenges of change that we may give birth to the child that is The Light of The World.

Franklin alderman lands movie offers over dating video

Franklin Alderman Dana McLendon’s Hot-Crazy Matrix” video has drawn more than 5.2 million page views. (Photo: Submitted )

FRANKLIN – Franklin Alderman Dana McLendon's "Hot-Crazy Matrix" has made it to the "unicorn zone" of viral videos.

That is, the seven-minute parody dating video has become something rarely seen even in the world of Internet celebrity and popularity. It's become a cultural sensation.

"Hot-Crazy Matrix" has drawn more than 5.2 million page views and stirred up laughter, outrage, parodies, and praise and vitriol along the way.

(The video, for the uninitiated, features McLendon standing at a white board and detailing a "hot-to-crazy" scale to help men looking for women. The matrix features such areas as the "danger zone," the "date zone," the "wife zone" and the "unicorn zone.")

Its popularity is only gathering momentum. McLendon, 46, says he is weighing three offers, including from a major film studio, to produce feature films spawned from the "Hot-Crazy Matrix" video. He's landed a Hollywood agent. He's appeared on TV host Tucker Carlson's show. He's readying a line of "Hot-Crazy" merchandise, including T-shirts and stickers.

And when McLendon's not taking phone calls from strangers who want to congratulate him on his video, he's fielding calls from at least one Grammy-winning recording artist who wants to chat. (McLendon isn't dropping names yet.)

For a longtime Franklin alderman, Fieldstone Farms resident and married father of two sons, the experience has been — like seeing a unicorn — a bit surreal.

"I've had people I've never met call me and say thank you. I've had people stop me and want to take a selfie with me," McLendon said. "I've had calls from legit TV and movie people who said, 'We think it's hilarious. We want to go with this.' "

The video also has drawn its share of backlash — some of it quite scathing — and its share of parodies.

McLendon, who is a criminal defense attorney, isn't shy about defending himself and pointing out that the video is intended as a joke.

He also notes that the people who hated the video have helped drive its popularity.

"It went viral because most people that saw it thought it was funny," McLendon said. "Most people thought it was funny because there are certain uncomfortable truths that are present, and even some of the haters will admit that. It got to the level that it was viral enough that the professional haters picked it up."

From there the video has only added page views along the way.

Even while McLendon fields movie offers and readies the "Hot-Crazy Matrix" merchandise, he acknowledges that it's rare to have a film produced at all, much less a film that's successful.

Movie or no movie, he's not slowing down. McLendon is already putting together ideas for possible videos or speaking engagements.

"All of my life I have walked into rooms and made everyone in the room laugh for free," McLendon said. "If they pay me to do it, fine. I'm going to keep doing it either way."

Reach Kevin Walters at 615-771-5472 and on Twitter @thekevinwalters.

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