Friday 31 January 2014

Dating tips for men

Our Ten Favorite Dating Tips for Men



In all the years, after all the articles, these are the ten best bits of advice I’ve ever given to men who are out there dating women.



Get Clear on The Red Flags That Matter



There are red flags that are annoying, and red flags that are Molotov cocktails waiting to burn your life down. Treat each accordingly. A beautiful and kind woman with an annoying laugh may be tough on a long car ride, but at least she thinks you’re funny. Issues involving honesty, money, substances, entitlement, and kindness should have you running for the door.



Think, At Least a Little, About What You Need



Who are you? What do you like? If you’re a sports junkie who has season tickets to the Celtics, do you want a woman who hates basketball and wants you home every night? Too many times men end up with women who don’t like the life they cherish. This happens for two reasons: 1)She’s on her best behavior. 2) He isn’t self-aware enough to say, “I can’t/won’t ever give up my love of the Celtics. You okay with that?” Yes, you have to compromise some, but get the important cards on the table early and stick to them.



Be the Best Version of Yourself



Chances are, you don’t need to be anybody else to attract a great girl. There’s someone who will love you. But you may very well need to be the best version of yourself to attract a woman. Dress nice, bathe, smell good, ask lots of questions, smile, laugh, exhibit a little knowledge about something interesting, and most importantly listen to her. Just smile, nod and listen.



Do a Couple of Little Chemistry Checks During the Night



Not sure how the date is going? Do a chemistry check. While you’re standing together waiting for a table, for example, lean into her a little bit (Be subtle!) and watch what she does. Does she lean away, or god forbid, step back? She’s not feeling it. If she lets you lean in or even leans into you, things are going quite well.



If You Don’t Want to Really Kiss Her Two Hours in…



…there’s probably no love connection. I know that it can take women two or three dates to feel chemistry. We don’t work that way. You should really want to kiss her, and if you don’t, it’s not a crime. Just be nice and enjoy the conversation.



Crazy Never Gets Any Better



You know that thing about red flags that can burn your life down. Crazy is #1 on the list. Run at the first whiff of crazy. Don't make the classic mistake of thinking, "She's beautiful. I can handle the crazy." Trust me. You can't handle it.



Don’t say “I’ll Call You.”



Just don’t. If you don’t want to call her, it’s a cheap lie. She might believe you and then feel bad when you don’t. Even if you do want to call her, telling her is meaningless. Just say, “I had a great time tonight.” It will make you stand out from the other Joes who say it as a matter of habit.



Get an Assessment from a Female Friend



Dating is one of those things that we’re supposed to be good at with no practice and no detailed feedback. We just know when it works or doesn’t. The easiest way to improve your dating skills is to take a female friend to lunch and talk her through your last date -- your clothes, your venue choice, your conversation, your end of date approach. She will have opinions on all these things, and next time you’ll be better for it.



Do Whatever It Takes to Get Some Confidence



EVERY SINGLE WOMAN we’ve ever asked says that confidence is a deal-breaker when it comes to choosing a guy. If you don’t have it, you’ve got to go get some. It typically helps to practice just talking to women you don’t already know. (Join a meetup. com group, go, and be friendly.) But being really good at something that you can talk about is a shortcut to confidence. If you are a great snowboarder, she’ll sense your confidence as you talk about it.



Go Some Place You Feel Comfortable



General Manners



Act naturally. Dates want to see what you're really like. Don't be late. There's the phrase "good things come to people who wait," but on the first date that doesn't apply. If it's been agreed on that you'll plan the activities, call your date in advance and let her know what the two of you are going to be doing. Nobody wants to wear heels and find out they're going rock climbing.



On the Date



Some men opt to open doors for their dates. Keep in mind that some people like this small courtesy, while others find it old fashioned and disempowering. Try it once. Ask your date if it bothers them. If your date doesn't like it, don't do it again. Chances are that if your date doesn't want doors opened for her, she won't want her chair pulled out for her either.



Going to dinner and then somewhere fun afterward is the standard routine for a reason. It gives people a chance to get to know one another. Go somewhere for dinner that's quiet enough that you can have a conversation. Comedy clubs are good after dinner places to go, movies aren't. If you want to find out if you're compatible with someone, staring at a movie screen for two hours isn't going to tell you.



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8 Essential First Date Tips for Men



You ever leave a date thinking, “Why didn’t I do that?” or “Why did I do that!”? I know I have, on multiple occasions. If right now you’re preparing for a date your brain is probably racing with all sorts of ideas and questions. I’ve been there, recently too. I get tempted to wish dating was easier. But the truth is I want dating to remain adventurous. I just need to plan ahead and prepare for it. Here are some first date tips and etiquette that you can always apply. Don’t be too cocky that you think you can just wing it. First impressions are important because you only get one shot.



Since I started dating I’ve gone on some wonderful first dates and some that I don’t recall because they were that horrible. The sad apart about the ones that went wrong is that I planned the date. If I was the conductor and the music didn’t flow then I can only blame myself. It might have gone different if I had Google to rely on back in the day. I didn’t’ though so I learned from my mistakes and others.



If you don’t know where to take her on a date and are looking for Date Ideas then be sure to check out my article – 25 First Date Ideas



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