Dating multiple women

Dating advice for people seeking love and better relationships.

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5 Reasons to Date Multiple Men at Once

I want to talk about multiplicity in your dating life. Many people have a negative view of serial daters. They think someone who dates several people at once must be a cheater, a commitment-phobe or at a minimum, a liar.

While this may be true of some women who are dating multiple people, I actually believe that there are many good (and, in fact, great) reasons to date several different people when you're single. I even think that dating many people might be one of the best ways to find the one person you are really looking to find.

Here are five great reasons to date multiple people -- at once:

1. It's good to date outside your comfort zone.

So many people date "comfortably"; they keep seeing people who are nice, but they never date anyone who really excites them. They go out with whoever happens to cross their path and then don't look any further. This person is fine, so there's no need to cast around for others, right? Wrong!

While you may need to do a little more leg work, and while it may require going on a lot more dates, it is absolutely worth it to get uncomfortable and to leave your dating comfort zone. It is only by really going out there and looking for someone who excites you that you will find that amazing relationship.

2. It's all about the law of attraction.

Meeting and attracting amazing men and women happens to those who have an "abundance mindset ." When you develop an abundance mindset, you see that the people who come into your life are ones to whom you are very attracted. They are people who stimulate your mind and your soul.

It's all about understanding the law of attraction. You attract who you are, not what you want. Until you go out and work on your inside, there's no way you're going to attract the person you want. If you live in fear and insecurity, you are going to meet someone exactly like you. Part of working on your inside is going out and meeting lots of people. Giving different types of people a chance on dates will help you to define who you really are and what you really want from a partner.

3. Get rid of your dating "musts."

A lot of women have a mental list of "musts" for the men and women they want to meet and date. Sometimes, what we think we want (or don't want) may not be so easily determined in one date. So it's time to realize that you don't have to make up your mind about someone you meet on date number one.

You don't have to make a decision on any particular number date. You can be dating six or eight people at a time, getting to know each of them. Some of them will "drop off" naturally as one or both of you realize you are not a good match. You don't have to tell the people you date how many people you're dating. There's nothing wrong with it, and it's really important to take your time and find out who you are and what you want.

4. It's all about being open and honest.

One reason a lot of women shy away from dating multiple people is because they feel awkward about what to say if one of the people they're seeing asks them about it. Dating several people at once is not about having to hide things or about being deceitful. As I said, in the beginning, you don't have to bring up the fact that you're dating around. All you have to do is show up, be present and connect with each person when you're with them. Just be yourself.

If someone asks you if you are dating others, you need to be honest and tell that person that you are, but that you are enjoying spending time with them. You have to be honest at every step along the way and do the right thing. If you end up liking one person more than the others and decide to see that person exclusively, you may have some awkward moments with the others, but being honest is always the right thing to do.

5. Use the power of choice.

The most important reason to date multiple people, in my opinion, is that it is the number one best way to really find the person you're looking for. It is the best way to avoid settling for someone who might be nice and fine but not really the best person for you.

It is important not to underestimate the power of choice. Get out there and know that an amazing relationship is out there for you, but that you are the one who has to go find it. Finding it means meeting and interacting with as many prospective significant others as possible. Using the power of choice is the key getting what you really want in your dating life.

The only way to figure out who and what you truly want in a partner is to date multiple people. Dating more than one person is a good thing and something that should be part of your dating life. It is a great way to really take the time to understand what you want in another person -- and to know when you have found it.

Speed dating

Speed dating is a formalized matchmaking process or dating system whose purpose is to encourage people to meet a large number of new people. Its origins are credited to Rabbi Yaacov Deyo of Aish HaTorah. originally as a way to help Jewish singles meet and marry. [ 1 ] [ 2 ] [ 3 ] SpeedDating . as a single word, is a registered trademark of Aish HaTorah. Speed dating . as two separate words, is often used as a generic term for similar events.

Contents

Organization [ edit ]

Usually advance registration is required for speed dating events. Men and women are rotated to meet each other over a series of short "dates" usually lasting from three to eight minutes depending on the organization running the event. At the end of each interval, the organizer rings a bell, clinks a glass, or blows a whistle to signal the participants to move on to the next date. At the end of the event participants submit to the organizers a list of who they would like to provide their contact information to. If there is a match, contact information is forwarded to both parties. Contact information cannot be traded during the initial meeting, in order to reduce pressure to accept or reject a suitor to his or her face.

There are many speed dating events now in the United Kingdom. Canada. and the United States. Requirements for each event vary with the organizer. Specific age range based on gender is a common restriction for events. Many speed dating events are targeted at particular communities: for example, LGBT people, polyamorists. [ 4 ] Christians. [ 5 ] Graduate student speed dating events are common. [ 6 ]

Practice [ edit ]

Some feel that speed dating has some obvious advantages over most other venues for meeting people, such as bars, discotheques. etc. in that everybody is purportedly there to meet someone, they are grouped into compatible age ranges, it is time-efficient, and the structured interaction eliminates the need to introduce oneself. Unlike many bars, a speed dating event will, by necessity, be quiet enough for people to talk comfortably. Speed dating is for singles.

Participants can come alone without feeling out of place; alternatively it is something that women who like to go out in groups can do together. [ 7 ]

Because the matching itself happens after the event, people do not feel pressured to select or reject each other in person. On the other hand, feedback and gratification are delayed as participants must wait a day or two for their results to come in.

The time limit ensures that a participant will not be stuck with a boorish match for very long, and prevents participants from monopolizing one another's time. On the other hand, a couple that decides they are incompatible early on will have to sit together for the duration of the round.

Most speed dating events match people at random, and participants will meet different "types" that they might not normally talk to in a club. On the other hand, the random matching precludes the various cues, such as eye contact, that people use in bars to preselect each other before chatting them up.

Online speed dating [ edit ]

Several online dating services offer online speed dating where users meet online for video, audio or text chats. The advantage of online speed dating is that users can go on dates from home as it can be done from any internet enabled computer. The disadvantage is people do not actually meet one another.

Scientific research [ edit ]

There have been several studies of the round-robin dating systems themselves, as well as studies of interpersonal attraction that are relevant to these events. Other studies found speed-dating data useful as a way to observe individual choices among random participants.

First impressions [ edit ]

A 2005 study at the University of Pennsylvania of multiple HurryDate speed dating events found that most people made their choices within the first three seconds of meeting. Furthermore, issues such as religion, previous marriages, and smoking habits were found to play much less of a role than expected. [ 8 ] [ 9 ]

A 2006 study in Edinburgh, Scotland showed that 45% of the women participants in a speed-dating event and 22% of the men had come to a decision within the first 30 seconds. It also found that dialogue concerning travel resulted in more matches than dialogue about films. [ 10 ]

In a 2012 study, researchers found that activation of specific brain regions while viewing images of opposite-sex speed dating participants was predictive of whether or not a participant would later pursue or reject the viewed participants at an actual speed dating event. Men and women made decisions in a similar manner which incorporated the physical attractiveness and likability of the viewed participants in their evaluation. [ 11 ]

Subconscious preferences [ edit ]

Malcolm Gladwell 's book on split-second decision making, Blink , introduces two professors at Columbia University who run speed-dating events. Drs. Sheena Iyengar and Raymond Fisman found, from having the participants fill out questionnaires, that what people said they wanted in an ideal mate did not match their subconscious preferences. [ 12 ] [ 13 ]

Olfaction and the MHC [ edit ]

A 1995 study at the University of Bern showed that women appear to be attracted to the smell of men who have different MHC profiles from their own, and that oral contraceptives reversed this effect. [ 14 ]

The MHC is a region of the human genome involved with immune function. Because parents with more diverse MHC profiles would be expected to produce offspring with stronger immune systems. dissimilar MHC may play a role in sexual selection.

A speed "date" lasting several minutes should be long enough for the MHC hypothesis to come into play, provided the participants are seated close enough together. [ citation needed ]

Olfaction and pheromones [ edit ]

The TV newsmagazine 20/20 once sent both a male and a female set of twins to a speed dating event. One of each set was wearing pheromones. and the ones wearing pheromones received more matches. [ 15 ]

Age and height preference [ edit ]

A 2006 study by Michele Belot and Marco Francesconi into the relative effects of preference versus opportunity in mate selection showed, while concluding that opportunity was more important than preference, that a woman's age is the single most important factor determining demand by men. [ 16 ] Although less important than it is to men, age is still a highly significant factor determining demand by women.

The same study found that a man's height had a significant impact upon his desirability, with a reduction in height causing a decrease in desirability at the rate of 5% per inch.

Selectivity [ edit ]

Studies of speed dating events generally show more selectivity among women than among men. For instance, the Penn study reported that the average man was chosen by 34% of the women and the average woman was chosen by 49% of the men. [ 8 ] New studies suggest that the selectivity is based on which gender is seated and which is rotating. This new study showed that when men were seated and the women rotated, the men were more selective. [ 17 ]

Spin-offs [ edit ]

The popularity or charm of speed dating has led to at least one offspring: Speed Networking. A structured way of running business networking events with the goal of making meeting potential business contacts easier and more productive. Some speed dating companies have now started offering free speed dating where you do not pay unless you meet somebody you like.

Business speed dating has also been used in China as a way for business people to meet each other and to decide if they have similar business objectives and synergies. [ citation needed ] Speed dating offers participating investors and companies an opportunity to have focused private meetings with targeted groups in a compact time frame.

Why Date a Chinese Woman?

Commitment to Honesty and Integrity

In an effort to try to bring honesty and integrity to the online dating industry at large, something that is sadly lacking to a large degree, ChinaLoveMatch. net has joined forces with two other sites that are also well respected for their open and transparent dealings with their members and together have founded the International Alliance for Honest Dating sites.

The goal of the Alliance is to educate the public on these fraudulent sites and their illegal activities, on how to avoid being sucked in by such sites and to bring together all honest sites under a standard code of behavior that will guarantee that all members of these sites are safe and secure in their search for a real and lasting long term relationship, partnership or marriage.

Dating Israeli Women: A Guide by the Perplexed

“You have to find an English speaker,” opined John over lunch on Hashmona’im Street last week, as I whinged about my latest debacle with Israel’s finest.

And John may well have a point. But it takes a strong-willed man to settle for fish and chips or a Big Mac and fries, when he could, instead, feast on a Me’urav Yerushalmi (Jerusalem mixed grill).

J, Israeli, 40 and divorced (plus none) – whom I had met through JDate (I am, depressingly, back. again ) – was that perfect Ashkenazi father/Sephardi mother combo: tall, willowy, olive skin, and taltalim (those unmistakably Israeli curls). And clever to boot. A Me’urevet Tel Avivit (Tel Aviv mix), if you like. And we had been on two extremely encouraging dates before the start of the fun and games.

Our third meeting – preceded by a discernible tailing-off in our flirtatious, daily text messaging – is cancelled by J, by sms, on the very same evening, with more excuses than a Hasmo boy. “pressure at work. not feeling well. Will call you.” But no call.

Just to be one hundred percent that my intuition is correct – I know that I will not be able to cope with the teasing thought that that body, skin and hair (and, of course, mind) might, just might. – I text J to tell her that I have got the message (that she is “not particularly interested in pursuing this”).

“Wrong again,” she texts back. “Will call the second I leave work.” But, again, nada.

The following morning, I receive an e-mail from J containing the exact same excuses. Petulant and keyboard happy as ever, I cannot resist the knee-jerk response: “Not looking for great dates at this stage. Or excuses. Or promises of phone calls.”

The End.

As usual, I search for possible reasons for this latest failure. I ponder, for example, whether having been bolder, more forthright, more Israeli, and having made a move in the second date tapas bar might, just might, have paid dividends. Most Israeli guys would have in the first date pub. (I take with a pinch of salt, these days, the Israeli woman’s oft-heard assertion that she likes English manners. They most like what they are used to.)

There is little, however, to be gained from idle speculation or self-flagellation. But why is it so damn difficult to meet a nice, genuine, uncomplicated woman in this city? Yes, yes (you slaves to your therapists), I know . I must take my share of the responsibility. It must be my fault, too. And sometimes it is. But more often, like this time, it just isn’t .

Finding attractive women in Tel Aviv is, of course, not a problem. Walking its streets and boulevards, or whiling away the hours in its cafes and bars, most male visitors (of a heterosexual bent, at least) come to believe that they have found themselves in some kind of female wonderland. Indeed, so high is the general standard of totty here that many people (or, at least, those who don’t know me that well!) cannot understand why I am still single, or not, at the very least, having a lot more fun than I am (but it’s sex with someone I love!) And I can understand their bemusement: stick your very average Tel Avivit – one whom an Israeli guy would not look at twice – in a London “Jew do,” and the males will think that all their Hanukkahs have come at once.

The empirical evidence, however, can be more than a little misleading. And dating Israeli women, while often enjoyable, even memorable, rarely comes – for the non-native, at least – without substantial challenges, stresses and aggravation. Indeed, the lure of more attractive, hotter blooded females – accompanied, as it usually is, with better, more frequent, and certainly swifter (as in earlier, rather than shorter) rumpy-pumpy – is offset by behaviour that can range from the puzzling to the downright objectionable.

So, for the uninitiated, here are a few tips – of a “do as I say,” rather than “as I do,” nature – gleaned from my experiences dating Israeli women and, especially, Tel Aviviot (who, as with Jews, are “just like everybody else, only more so”).

Don’t even attempt to understand them. It isn’t possible. This is even truer of Israeli women than of the fairer [snort!] sex in general. You will have great dates after which they won’t answer/return your calls, and dire ones following which they will demand to know why you haven’t called.

Don’t be shocked by anything . From inappropriate, even outrageous, remarks and conversation on the date, to last minute (and I mean minute!) cancellations before it (see previous posts: T. A. Woman: Feeling a Lemon in the Big Orange. Suicide is Painless: Dating Etiquette in the Holy Land. and The Tel Avivit’s Subtle Art of Seduction ). First date sex is also far from unusual here: if you are a nice Jewish boy from a nice Jewish community – like North-West London, for instance, where “getting to know” a Jewish girl on a first date would be far more newsworthy than anything on the front page of the JC – but that is what you are after, Aliyah may be the best move you ever make!

Take any criticism levelled at you, but (unless you are planning to dump them anyway) avoid the temptation to give any back. Most Israeli women can’t take it. I recently went out with a Rebecca, who, on our second date, and without warning, saw fit to pat the (negligible) protuberance from my t-shirt. “ Yesh lecha keres s!” (you have a pot belly), she exclaimed, clearly delighted with herself, as if having discovered a new planet. When she brought up the subject again, on the fourth date – evidently, neither my ‘corpulence’ nor Rebecca’s ‘frankness’ were deal breakers (40-something beggars, especially . can’t be choosers) – I was better prepared: I informed her that I like my breasts large (not true, incidentally), and enquired whether she might be willing to go under the knife for me. Her face! What a picture! She looked like she had just swallowed a Beit Hashita hot pepper whole. (Neither did Rebecca care for me asking her not to throw every scrap of food that she wanted to bin to Stuey and Dexxy instead, thus reducing her sorties to the garbage. though she had absolutely no problem telling me that it was inappropriate to joke with her 5-year old daughter about locking her in the fridge (was it?))

If you feel that you are being used, that is because you probably are . I also recently dated a Maya, who demanded a detailed date plan (verbal) ahead of each of our meetings. And she vetoed many of my suggestions (especially of dining options), leaving me with the distinct impression that she saw me as a kind of TimeOut Tel Aviv with a MasterCard. or, more accurately, she was the TimeOut . I was the MasterCard.

Multiple date. It is almost an unwritten rule that simultaneous/multiple dating is fine until you have been on three or four dates with the same person (and, sometimes, even after you have had sex). Nearly everyone here – or in Tel Aviv, at least – does so, so put your chutz la’aretz (out of Israel) values to one side and get on the same playing field! And as a corollary.

Keep notes. I once simultaneously dated a woman with an Afghani mother, and another with an Afghani ex-mother-in-law. I got my wires crossed, and mentioned the wrong one to the wrong woman. This might not seem a particularly big deal when dealing with Afghani matriarchs (and I extricated myself easily), but it would have been a huge one if I had referred to the wrong date about ­– and this is not an invented scenario – the inspection, by JFK security on ‘her’ departure from the US, of the other ’s collection of dildos. I would even recommend keeping a brief, identifying note following each name in your mobile phone: an age thing perhaps, but I find it harder and harder to remember, and to differentiate between, Hebrew names. Not so long ago, I called the wrong woman, informing her that I was on my way to pick her up. “What are you talking about?!” she squealed. Realising my mistake, I panicked and hung up, and, there being no way back from that, deleted her details from my phone.

You may well, by this stage, be asking yourself why you would possibly want to heed the dating advice of a single 44-year old who lives with his two dogs. and you’d be quite right!

8 Tips On Where To Find “Good Thai Girls” and How To Date Good Thai Girls?

Shiploads of Western men arrive in Thailand every year, many of whom seek a Thai partner or wife. The largest error a lot of these men make though, is deciding on a ‘bar girl’ or prostitute for a wife, merely because these girls are conveniently available and the majority of them speak English. (I have a separate post dedicated to picking up bar girls, working girls and hired guns for ONSs and flings .) However, if you would not wed a prostitute or date in your very own nation, why would you intend to day or marry one in Thailand?

For a great deal of guys though, they’re uncertain on ways to meet a ‘Good Thai Girl’ (this is what the Thais call them) and, even if they do, exactly what do they talk to her concerning and how do they manage her? For those Western men which are searching for a good Thai girl, here are a couple of ideas to assist you discover a nice Thai partner or Thai wife and, rather than just a Girl Friday.

1. A “Good Thai Girl” Won’t Talk To You Initially

When meeting Thai women, and a Thai girl talks to you prior to you chatting with her, more often than not, she’s not a good Thai girl. Well brought up Thai girls from good households are shown never to chat to men initially, and absolutely never ever move toward one. No matter how much the girl attempts to encourage you otherwise, she ain’t good Thai girl.

2. Where To Meet A “Good Thai Girl”?

“Bpai Nai Jer Pooying Thai Tee Dee” (Where To Find A Thai Girl That’s Good)

Upper-class, well-raised “Hi-so” (High Society) Thai women ultimately prefer marrying their own kind. However, there’s a large amount of Thai women who like foreign men and would love one as a boyfriend. Thai men are typically infamous for having a lot of girlfriends and a bunch of them still have a mistress (or mia noi) even after they’re married. As a result, quite a few educated Thai girls aren’t that interested in marrying a Thai man. These girls hold the concept that foreign men are much better. A wonderful way to meet Thai females is to socialize in coffee shops or book shops. Thai ladies will certainly tend to explore in groups, so you could have to have sufficient guts to chat to several Thai women simultaneously. Strategically sitting at a table next to a group of Thai females and asking them to aid you with the food selection is a terrific method to begin. It kinda gives them a chance to practice their English too. You will certainly get a lot of giggles and blushes however there will go to the very least one girl in the team that will certainly aid you more than the others. (Alert… Could be a good wing-woman if not a target!)

Meeting Educated Thai Women in Bookstores – GirlsGirlsAsia. com

Book shops are likewise terrific areas to meet ladies (if you’re in Bangkok, Kinokuniya at Siam Paragon mall is a good one) and some of have cafes too. If you strike up a talk with a nice girl, you can adjourn for a drink.

A pal of mine met his Thai now-wife on a boat in Bangkok while on a visit to the temples (as suggested in the Valentine’s Day post ). He wound up resting next to a Thai woman and they started to chat. One year later on, he was married to her. She’s wise, well-educated, from a great family and is an awesome partner.

One location not to expect to meet a good Thai girl is in a bar. While some good Thai girls will visit bars with buddies, the majority of will not, as most good Thai girls don’t drink. If you meet a Thai girl in a bar, especially if she’s out-going and a little bit aggressive, she’s USUALLY not the good girl she says she is.

3. Wine And Dine The Chaperone.

“Bpai Gin Kow” (Let’s Go Eat)

Once you found a nice girl, ask her out for dinner! Thais love eating more so than any other nationality and they LOVE dinner outings. Nonetheless, a good Thai girl tends to bring a buddy, a sis, or a cousin with her on at least the initial two or three dates (in some cases more) and you will certainly be expected to pay for both of them. Good Thai girls always need to have a chaperone so, if the girl you meet promptly accepts meet you for supper alone, chances are she’s not a good girl or has something to hide. I personally have no problem with this because I will then get to observe how she interacts in her preferred company, and secondly, dining in Thailand is cheap.

4. What Gifts To Buy Good Thai Girls?

“Sirh Kong Fakh” (Buy Gifts)

Thai girls merely adore getting presents and that’s one thing Thai men are really good at. Thai girls of any age (including in their 40s) love soft toys. Thai girls adore them. Teddys, Fluffy Dogs, Plushies… they’ll go fawning like “Narak Jang Lerei!” (It’s so cute!) . Chocolates work great too. Outer-province girls may not appreciate chocolates as much just a warning. Music boxes are great too. Women love receiving flowers. OH! And Thai men are often too stingy to buy bouquets. These don’t necessarily cost alot. The stalls in the Thai market places give the shopping centres a run for their money at a fraction of the cost.

5. Meeting The Family

6. Sweet-talk her.

One thing Thai men are actually good at is being pleasant. They sweet talk girls, they are always kind to them, they get them gifts, they take them out for lunch, and they enable the girls to think they’re the one in charge. Subsequently, a Thai girl is going to expect you to behave the same – so you’d better not be too nice than you can keep up with. If you are also aggressive, too rude, not respectful when you’re out with her, and coerce her to have sex with you, she will not remain for long. Think of your long-lasting targets, and hold your horses. Thai females usually make incredible spouses, so treat her nicely from the minute you meet her and you won’t be sorry.

7. Try To Find A Girl You Have Something In Common With.

A lot of foreigners in Thailand wed Thai women they have nothing in common with. I made that mistake too earlier on, hence it didn’t work out. Numerous of them wed ladies which don’t speak too much English and they do not speak too much Thai. Years on you step away and realize that you’ve merely been in love with the culture and experiences you had together, than her . There are lots of Thai women who wish to have a foreign boyfriend or partner so choose wisely. Ultimately, I highly encourage you to learn to speak Thai. It opens totally new dynamics to relationships with Thai women.

8. Don’t Expect A Good Thai Girl To Have Sex With You On The First Date.

I personally think that if a Thai girl is willing to hop in bed with you one the first date, she’s probably been promiscuous with other men too. The better Thai women take a longer time to warm up. In fact, among the “hi-so” Good Thai Girls, you’d be surprised at how many are actually virgins till marriage. They could use some guidance in bed once you get to that.

Is it Really Possible for a Man With LOW or NO Confidence With Women and Dating To Build His Confident . Powerful . and Masculine Sexual Identity

Men Everywhere Are Tired of Being Fake With Women - No More Fake Lines, No More Fake Attitudes, and No More Lame Results.

FROM CARLOS XUMA: Monday, 12:24 AM.

Dear Friend,

If there's one thing I know, Men NEED to feel sexually confident and capable of attracting women.

Not "want" to feel - they NEED to feel this kind of ability. That's what drives us as men.

And I'm not just talking about the average woman or the one you'll be bored of dating in a few weeks. You want a HIGH QUALITY woman that will add value to your life for months and years to come.

You don't ever want to settle .

I'm about to take you inside the somewhat demented world of the " pickup artist ," and see what most guys will never see. How REAL attraction and confidence works for women from the inside out.

Warning! This story gets weird, and even a bit intense.

When it comes to dating women, sometimes a man will do anything to attract women.

And sometimes there are things that NO man should do.

Before we go any further, I need you to ask yourself something.

Have you ever read an opening 'line' you learned from some book or message board that sounded so cool when you read it, but you tried it and fell flat on your face? Something like: "Hey, who lies more, men or women?"

Have you ever wondered how you can get a truly spectacular HIGH-QUALITY woman into your life, instead of dating women that aren't up to your standards?

Have you ever tried to talk to a woman in a bar or a club, and the conversation ran out in just a couple of minutes? One minute you're talking about something with her, and she's laughing and flipping her hair, the next minute you're sitting in the middle of one of those uncomfortable silences.

Maybe you've tried some of the "pickup" routines that you heard or read about, but you wound up feeling like you were impersonating a rock star, or pretending to be a person you weren't.

Have you ever been out on a date with a woman you don't want to mess it up with, and you found yourself wondering just HOW MUCH to reveal about yourself. After all, you don't want to scare her off by telling her the wrong things, but what's good to tell her - and what's bad.

Maybe you're out talking to women and approaching women. and now you're wondering how to not only overcome your own fears and doubts, but you want to know what the Big Picture is - How to go from A to Z with a woman and escalate naturally and confidently from meeting her to taking things to a more sexual level.

"Men Will Sacrifice Anything - Including Their Identity - To Attract Women. "

It's true.

When I was out meeting women, and I got into a one-on-one conversation with a woman that thought was attractive, I would throw away almost everything that made me unique just to meet a woman's expectations and attract her to me.

But here I was, trying to give her exactly what she SHOULD want - and what every woman seemed to say she wanted.

But I never felt like it was enough .

It got to the point where I almost gave up.

The more I went out and met women, the more I found out that "me" didn't seem to be enough to attract her. I'd talk to women about my hobbies and what I thought was interesting, but I never seemed to get anywhere.

When I was on a date, I'd ask a bunch of questions - because I'm supposed to show interest in HER. Then I'd end up telling her about my family and my job.

But by the end of the date, it never felt like any spark had been made.

It seemed like telling her about me bored her in some way.

After a while I started being a little "flexible" with the truth. I found myself purposefully hiding certain facts and even exaggerating things about me to impress her, because I figured she would find me more attractive up front.

And then later on down the road I could be more "real" with her. I even tried being more like a "player" to jack up women's attraction for me.

Well, that actually backfired on me, too, because even though I got them more interested in me at the start, I started having less success getting another date with them. I lost her trust by being too intense with the player vibe.

My game was actually WORSE when I was using pickup techniques than when I was just being "myself."

Do you ever feel like a woman can see right through you and the methods you use to try to get her interested?

Have you ever been afraid of being "caught" using an opener or a line when you're trying to approach a woman? Or that she's got her "player" radar on and she's already on high alert for 'your kind' of guy?

Do you ever feel like dating starts out with some interest, but most of the time you never seem to get off the ground with a woman? You feel like it's an uphill battle to generate interest from her, and the more you try, the less she seems to respond?

You're not alone.

I felt like this for years.

The funny thing is, most of the guys out there that I work with will try anything to improve their ability with women. They try all the pheromone colognes, witty openers, and hypnotic patterns. In the end, they just feel like they can't do it because - they say - "it's not me."

Here's The Dirty Truth You Didn't Know About Being A "Pickup Artist. "

I've heard from a lot of guys that picked up a copy of the book "The Game" telling me that none of the lines and openers they got from it work anymore because ALL the guys are using these techniques.

You know what? This is always going to be true. You can find a thousand techniques out there, and only a handful that actually work for you.

These routines and techniques that guys teach on TV reality shows are just to give you an idea of the type of things that women find interesting, and the word-for-word routines are not meant to be parroted to every woman you see.

It's like learning how to play guitar. You can learn to play a Led Zeppelin tune or two if you want, and you'll sound like Jimmy Page. But that's all you'll ever sound like. until you learn how to play like YOU .

I actually did this for years playing guitar before I figured out that I was great at sounding like other people . but I just couldn't sound like ME .

I wasn't very original, and I started feeling and acting like a clone instead of being unique.

And that's how using routines and lines can actually cripple your success with women . because you are undermining your belief and confidence in yourself by using borrowed words.

"Stop Telling Yourself That You're Not What She Wants. "

Again, the biggest mistake we make as men is assuming that because what you're doing isn't working, that means that it's YOU that's at fault. As if you're entire value as a man is based on a skill you've never been taught.

Just like the example I just gave you of the guitar style I was trying to find, there are TONS of "systems" and outer game techniques out there that work the same way. You learn how they work, and then you get rid of them because they are just training wheels to get you riding the bike yourself.

Long after all the clever pickup lines and approaches have been exposed, your authenticity and REAL character will NEVER be out of style or a liability. You can't get caught using one of these "techniques" if you're always being YOU .

Pretty cool, huh?

This is what I want to teach you. How to get women interested in you and build deep rapport with them by just being YOURSELF, instead of trying to be someone you're not . or use other people's words.

No matter how many techniques you learn, you will always end up back here with me working on your inner game . No technique in the world create this strength of foundation you'll get from complete self-confidence.

And The Secret To Getting Women That No One Ever Told You About.

For the longest time, I've wondered "What is it that makes certain guys REALLY successful with women? But what I noticed was that whenever another guy tried to imitate that same success - using the exact same techniques that the other guy was using and had success with - the guy imitating him had a tough time.

(In fact, the guy who was trying to model the successful guy often had a much tougher time in the long run. I'll come back to this in a second. )

Even I had the same problems. I'd use an opener I learned from someone, and when I walked over and used it to start a conversation, I would sound like some phony B-movie actor delivering a bad line. It sounded corny and stupid.

One girl even stopped in the middle of taking a sip from her drink, squinted at me, and said, "Did you just try that with all the other girls in here?" Then she rolled her eyes and shook her head, and I felt that sinking sensation in the pit of my stomach as my confidence crashed and burned .

I think you know what that feels like, don't you?

The one thing that women need to trust you and give themselves to you is something that most guys completely miss. It's a little word that starts with an "A" and ends in "C." I'll explain this word to you right now.

Wouldn't it be nice to have a system that you could use that you would never feel "caught" with?

Something that comes from your own unique identity? That doesn't feel fake ?

Women Can See Who You Really Are - No Matter What You Do or Say.

Human beings are amazing creatures, and women are even more amazing in their ability to pick up on you - your vibe!

Here's something I discovered along the way that finally gave me the "A-Ha!" moment I needed, and I want to share it with you. It took me years to finally "get" this into my thick skull.

This is what I figured out:

Women have a highly specialized social radar. It's a highly sensitive instinct that almost seems like Telepathy . It's her social radar - and it can detect B. S. from a mile away. It's just like Spidey-sense, complete with the tingling.

Women can tell if you're being YOU or trying to be someone you're not. And she can do this in the first 2 or 3 minutes of a conversation, almost without fail.

And here's something else:

The one thing a woman is attracted to first - the one thing she must test you for before she will trust you and go further - is if you're AUTHENTIC .

She has to know you're SINCERE.

Most of our brain matter, in fact, did not evolve so you could solve tricky Algebra problems, or memorize plays from Shakespeare.

Most of your mind evolved so that you could tell when someone was being sincere with you, so that you could make a decision about who to trust - or not.

This isn't a life-or-death decision today, but it used to be, back when you had to know that your friend Grok wouldn't abandon you in the middle of a mammoth hunt.

Women have this exact same specialized brain wiring . but it's even more effective at figuring out men . She needs to know very quickly if the guy she's interested in is an asset - or a potentially life-threatening risk .

So you see, the secret is not trying to camouflage your attempts to get a woman interested in you, or try to sneak in with some hypnotic technique, or hide behind a "pickup" routine. Quite simply because YOU CAN'T HIDE YOURSELF from a woman.

The REAL "trick" to getting women is in learning how to be attractive to a woman from your own unique personality.

Because that's all she's ever going to believe about you anyway.

But I'll bet you've figured this out on your own, haven't you?

I used to play a lot of "pickup games" with women, but then I finally realized that the only women that are interested in all these fake routines and games are the 22-year-old drunk party girls. These girls are only there to have fun and maybe hookup. You really don't need a lot of skill to pickup on them.

The kind of high-quality woman that I wanted to find - the woman that was interesting to talk to - as well as get physical with - was not going to be spending her time at the clubs every night.

Deadly aim, precise accuracy.

And then I could target the kind of woman I wanted to have in my life.

The best thing about choices is being able to choose what you want, not what you have to settle for.

The Secret Reason Women Can Smell Your Real Confidence and Personality.

Have you ever had a woman tell you that you should "just be yourself."

Well, let me ask you something: When are you ever not being "yourself?"

The only time is when you try to pretend that you have qualities that you don't really believe you do.

That one bit of female advice is completely true, but also completely damaging to a guy who doesn't understand what women are really saying when they say "Just be yourself." You have to be "you," but you also have to be the best version of you that you can show.

Here's something you might not know: If you try to be someone you're not by borrowing someone else's stories or showing off a lifestyle you haven't experienced, you give off a very weird 'vibe' to every person you meet. ESPECIALLY women, who have psychic tentacles that can feel out any part of your personality that doesn't seem to match your behavior.

Look, I don't want to get too philosophical here, but the truth is, You are who you THINK you are.

Your identity is the CORE of who you are - your true PERSONALITY.

Your personality isn't likely to change without a lot of painful, unnecessary work - and you should never have to change it.

A lot of guys think that since they haven't experienced the kind of massive success they want with women, and their self-esteem is sending them all kinds of conflicting information, they believe that they cannot turn their game around with women.

This is NOT true, and I'm going to tell you how ANY guy can turn his game around.

On one side you have your "Personality ," and on the other hand you have your " Personas ."

Your "Persona" is who you are when you let other people influence how you act . Personas are FLUID and FLEXIBLE. You can create personas and still be true to YOU. You have a persona for going to church, or talking to a group of people, or going out in a bar.

Your persona is just the parts of you that you choose to bring out in certain social situations.

So the best way to attract women is to be the best YOU you can be .

And that is what I show men how to do. Not be somebody else that feels fake or weird. Just be the best YOU.

To do this, I came up with a model of the ideal man that most guys want to be. I call him the Alpha Man .

What Is the "Alpha Man?"