Tuesday 20 May 2014

Dating puns

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A fish pun in picture form - they're just so versatile !



“Brevity is the sole of wit”



If you can stop powen - ing n00bs and downloading internet prawn for a second, you may find this interesting, particularly if you're a sucker for word-play. Fish Puns are Cod 's gift to comedy. For those who love nothing more than the art of the crappie pun, the fish pun is surely the apex of the form. Comedians will often spend a great deal of time fishing for a way to include a piscine pun within their joke, whilst experts will try to utilise them as the hook of the gag. The following is the offishal Uncyclopedia guide to fish puns, the fin-omenon and the use thereof. Ya know, just for the halibut ?



Contents



So why are Fish Puns Brill - iant?



Be in-tuna with your ordnance or you will get caught.



There is almost no situation in life that doesn't offer an op-perch - tuna - ty for a good fish pun. If you've ever haddock - ray - ving for piscine based wordplay. there's always one to suit your need. Indeed, some fish are so improbably named that it seems their names were invented sole - ly for the porpoise of punning. Take, for example, the sturgeon . the pike or the particularly oddly named hugetits found in the Mediterranean Sea, particularly in the summer months. Such gifts to the astute wordsmith cannot have come about by accident, and it is tempting to infer that The Almighty created such species, proving not only His existence, but also that He likes a giggle as much as the next man .



How to use the fish pun



There is a skill to using fish puns well. Anyone can add a ruffe and ready fish pun to conversation, and have a halibut time. But experts will enjoy more subtle attempts to weaver fish pun into discourse without tang - ling themselves up.



You may be settling into salmon chanted evening with a dear friend (fishnets look better with eels incidentally) and are angling to impress by becoming a dab hand with your fishy puns. No need to clam up, you don't need to be a brain sturgeon to catch them hook line and sinker, but it is important not to skate around a few important points before trying to reel them in.



Firstly you need to be in-tuna with your ordnance. Your puns must be in the right plaice or your humour will be left floundering in the shallows with no sole .



For a successful net result you must catch people's attention.



Fish puns are welcome any day of the week, barramundi .



People will consider your humour a load of pollacks if you use too many puns.



To really get them pouting. you must be subtle and creative with your whiting .



For some, the fish pun may be an acquired taste. Take for example the case of cunning ling - uist Miss Crabby Patty the fishmongers daughter. She was a Lemon Soul who hated winkles. and cockles. preferring kippers or the whiff of bearded clam. Often she would present her slab and ask ladies to fillet. Despite the fact that she smelt funny many mussel bound seaman tried to dock their tackle, but were never allowed anywhere near her crustacean. She also liked to discus music, her favorite song being the classic Italian folk tune that went, When the moon hits your eye like a big pizza pie that's a moray .



Haddock about enough of this yet?



Jesus! I said FISH PUNS, not fish buns dammit!



No need to carp. Admit it, you're having a whale of a time! There's no need to be koi - while there may be a few gaffs in this article here and there, we're not molly-codling you. You might find a time when a good fish pun is your dace in the hole, particularly if you need to make a few squid.



But how can fish puns make you money? Well, let's say you were lured in by a loan shark. Eel go overboard to make sure you pay, and you definitely don't want to get battered right? Eminent British humourist Stephen Fry has been making money out of chipping in with fish puns since he was in school. and you too could make a pretty blenny - all you need do is come out of your shell a bit more.



It's simply a matter of pooling your resources and poaching a few good lines in when you can. If you can get people laughing off the scale, waves of cash will soon be rolling in your direction. Just don't krill the joke by making too many puns at the same time. It's no fluke that I manage it, you've just got to market them in the right way. Maybe you should mullet over with a nice cup of char before you scampi off in a melan-coley mood.



If you catch our drift.



More tips, for those waiting with baited breath.



Whatever you do, don't start trawling around. To save your puns from the jaws of defeat you must keep the endolphins flowing by avoiding the missed-hake of repeating the same puns. You must spawn something new to avoid the stench of sending your ordnance orfe home. Try and tell at least 5 or 6 good ones in a roe before you let them tail off a bit.



Getting more obscure fish in your puns is always good for a challenge. If you can get a grouper them in, you can allow yourself a celebratory wahoo. For a real challenge, and maximum geek points, try getting the Hylian Loach into conversation - even skilled wordsmiths like Marlin Brando would struggle to slip that in as anything other than a red herring .



Alternatives to the fish pun



Don't foal for those pony lines. Horse puns are just pain tacky.



So is the fish pun really the finnacle of wordplay from the animal kingdom? Surely there are other species that have similar po-tench - ial? How about horse puns?



Neigh. you don't want to leave yourself up the creek without a saddle. Horse puns are a red herring and can be a right night mare . You will only stirrup a lot of trouble and make you anemone. You'll lose hands down, but mane point is that no one will pony up any cash for them. Horse puns are just plain equine.



Don't be shellfish now, you don't want to make a rod for your own back and horse puns will sell you up the river. Kipper lid on the horse puns and stick to the turbot - charged fishy ones and you will leave them bream - ing from ear to ear. The world is your oyster now. Bring a new ray of light to the sometimes bleak sea of fish puns.



Similarly, you may think that puns about thumbtacks are spectacular. The truth is, they are nothing short of tacky. and to keep your reputation intact. you'd best steer clear of them too.



Do fish puns get your seal of approval?



Seals are mammals, stupid.



Pun



The pun . also called paronomasia . is a form of word play that suggests two or more meanings, by exploiting multiple meanings of words, or of similar-sounding words, for an intended humorous or rhetorical effect. [ 1 ] [ 2 ] These ambiguities can arise from the intentional use of homophonic. homographic. metonymic. or metaphorical language. A pun differs from a malapropism in that a malapropism uses an incorrect expression that alludes to another (usually correct) expression, but a pun uses a correct expression that alludes to another (sometimes correct but more often absurdly humorous) expression. Henri Bergson defined a pun as a sentence or utterance in which "the same sentence appears to offer two independent meanings, but it is only an appearance; in reality there are two different sentences made up of different words, but claiming to be one and the same because both have the same sound". [ 3 ] Puns may be regarded as in-jokes or idiomatic constructions, given that their usage and meaning are entirely local to a particular language and its culture. For example, "Camping is intense." (in tents)



Contents



Typology [ edit ]



Puns can be classified in various ways:



The homophonic pun . a common type, uses word pairs which sound alike (homophones ) but are not synonymous. Walter Redfern exemplified this type with his statement, "To pun is to treat homonyms as synonyms ." [ 5 ] For example, in George Carlin 's phrase "Atheism is a non-prophet institution", the word "prophet " is put in place of its homophone "profit ", altering the common phrase "non-profit institution ". Similarly, the joke "Question: Why do we still have troops in Germany? Answer: To keep the Russians in Czech " relies on the aural ambiguity of the homophones "check " and "Czech ". Often, puns are not strictly homophonic, but play on words of similar, not identical, sound as in the example from the "Pinky and the Brain" cartoon film series: "I think so, Brain, but if we give peas a chance, won't the lima beans feel left out?" which plays with the similar—but not identical—sound of "peas" and "peace". [ 6 ]



A homographic pun exploits words which are spelled the same (homographs ) but possess different meanings and sounds. Because of their nature, they rely on sight more than hearing, contrary to homophonic puns. They are also known as heteronymic puns . Examples in which the punned words typically exist in two different parts of speech often rely on unusual sentence construction, as in the anecdote: "When asked to explain his large number of children, the pig answered simply: 'The wild oats of my sow gave us many piglets.' " An example which combines homophonic and homographic punning is Douglas Adams 's line "You can tune a guitar, but you can't tuna fish. Unless of course, you play bass ." The phrase uses the homophonic qualities of "tune a" and "tuna ", as well as the homographic pun on "bass", in which ambiguity is reached through the identical spellings of / ? b e? s / (a string instrument ), and / ? b ? s / (a kind of fish ).



Homonymic puns, another common type, arise from the exploitation of words which are both homographs and homophones. The statement "Being in politics is just like playing golf. you are trapped in one bad lie after another" puns on the two meanings of the word lie as "a deliberate untruth" and as "the position in which something rests". An adaptation of a joke repeated by Isaac Asimov gives us "Did you hear about the little moron who strained himself while running into the screen door?" playing on "strained" as "to give much effort" and "to filter". [ 7 ] A homonymic pun may also be polysemic . in which the words must be homonymic and also possess related meanings, a condition which is often subjective. However, lexicographers define polysemes as listed under a single dictionary lemma (a unique numbered meaning) while homonyms are treated in separate lemmata.



A compound pun is a statement that contains two or more puns. For example, a complex statement by Richard Whately includes four puns: "Why can a man never starve in the Great Desert. Because he can eat the sand which is there. But what brought the sandwiches there? Why, Noah sent Ham, and his descendants mustered and bred." [ 8 ] This pun uses "sand which is there/sandwiches there", "Ham /ham", "mustered/mustard", and "bred/bread". Similarly, the phrase "Piano is not my Forte" cleverly links two meanings of the words "forte" and "piano", one for the dynamic markings in music and the second for the literal meaning of the sentence. Compound puns may also combine two phrases that share a word. For example, "Where do mathematicians go on weekends? To a Mobius strip club!" puns on Mobius strip and strip club .



A recursive pun is one in which the second aspect of a pun relies on the understanding of an element in the first. For example the statement " ? is only half a pie ." ( ? radians is 180 degrees. or half a circle, and a pie is a complete circle ). Another example is "Infinity is not in finity ", which means infinity is not in finite range. Another example is "A Freudian slip is when you say one thing but mean your mother ." [ 9 ] Finally, we are given "Immanuel doesn't pun, he Kant" by Oscar Wilde [ citation needed ] .



Visual puns are used in many logos, emblems, insignia, and other graphic symbols, in which one or more of the pun aspects are replaced by a picture. In European heraldry. this technique is called canting arms. Visual and other puns and word games are also common in Dutch gable stones as well as in some cartoons. such as Lost Consonants and The Far Side .



Another type of visual pun exists in languages which use non-phonetic writing. For example, in Chinese, a pun may be based on a similarity in shape of the written character, despite a complete lack of phonetic similarity in the words punned upon. [ 10 ] Mark Elvin describes how this "peculiarly Chinese form of visual punning involved comparing written characters to objects". [ 11 ]



Richard J. Alexander notes two additional forms which puns may take: graphological (sometimes called visual) puns, such as concrete poetry ; and morphological puns, such as portmanteaus. [ 12 ]



Use [ edit ]



Comedy and jokes [ edit ]



Puns are a common source of humour in jokes and comedy shows. They are often used in the punch line of a joke, where they typically give a humorous meaning to a rather perplexing story. These are also known as feghoots. The following example comes from the movie Master and Commander: The Far Side of the World . though the punchline stems from far older Vaudeville roots. [ 13 ] The final line puns on the stock phrase "the lesser of two evils ".



Captain Aubrey, played by Russell Crowe. "Do you see those two weevils. Doctor. Which would you choose?" Dr. Maturin: "Neither. There's not a scrap of difference between them. They're the same species of Curculio ." Captain Aubrey: "If you had to choose. If you were forced to make a choice. If there were no other option." Dr. Maturin: "Well, then, if you're going to push me. I would choose the right-hand weevil. It has significant advantage in both length and breadth." Captain Aubrey: "There, I have you. Do you not know that in the Service. one must always choose the lesser of two weevils ?"



Puns often are used in the titles of comedic parodies. A parody of a popular song, movie, etc. may be given a title that hints at the title of the work being parodied, substituting some of the words with ones that sound or look similar. For example, collegiate a cappella groups are often named after musical puns to attract fans through attempts at humor. Such a title can immediately communicate both that what follows is a parody and also which work is about to be parodied, making any further "setup" (introductory explanation) unnecessary.



Literature [ edit ]



"Now is the winter of our discontent made glorious summer by this son of York" ( Son / sun )



Shakespeare was also noted for his frequent play with less serious puns, the "quibbles" of the sort that made Samuel Johnson complain, "A quibble is to Shakespeare what luminous vapours are to the traveller! He follows it to all adventures; it is sure to lead him out of his way, sure to engulf him in the mire. It has some malignant power over his mind, and its fascinations are irresistible." [ 14 ] Elsewhere, Johnson disparagingly referred to punning as "the lowest form of humour". [ citation needed ]



In the poem A Hymn to God the Father . John Donne. married to Anne More. reportedly puns repeatedly: "Son/sun" in the second quoted line, and two compound puns on "Donne/done" and "More/more". All three are homophonic, with the puns on "more" being both homographic and capitonymic . The ambiguities serve to introduce several possible meanings into the verses.



"When Thou hast done . Thou hast not done / For I have more . that at my death Thy Son / Shall shine as he shines now, and heretofore And having done that, Thou hast done ; / I fear no more ."



Alfred Hitchcock stated “Puns are the highest form of literature.” [ 15 ]



Rhetoric [ edit ]



Puns can function as a rhetorical device. where the pun serves as a persuasive instrument for an author or speaker. Although puns are often perceived as cliche. if used responsibly a pun “…can be an effective communication tool in a variety of situations and forms”. [ 16 ] A major difficulty in using puns in this manner is that the meaning of a pun can be interpreted very differently according to the audience’s background and can significantly subtract from a message. [ 17 ]



For example, John F. Kennedy ’s June 1963 West Berlin speech in the then Federal Republic of Germany. two years after the Berlin Wall was erected, is considered an inspiring speech for the people of West Berlin who hoped for a united Germany. [ 18 ] However, Kennedy is often misattributed as having made an unintentional pun that underscored the somber tone of the speech with the phrase:



“Ich bin ein Berliner”



The intent of phrase was to mean “I am a citizen of Berlin” but instead is often humorously mistranslated as “I am a jam doughnut ” with “Berliner” being the name of a common breakfast item in Berlin at the time. [ 19 ] It is disputed [ 20 ] whether that is really what the audience thought this is what was meant, but this example illustrates the folly of the unintentional pun.



Design [ edit ]



Like other forms of wordplay, paronomasia is occasionally used for its attention-getting or mnemonic qualities, making it common in titles and the names of places, characters, and organizations, and in advertising and slogans. [ 21 ] [ 22 ]



Many restaurant and shop names use puns: Cane & Able mobility healthcare, Tiecoon tie shop, Planet of the Grapes wine and spirits, [ 23 ] as do books, such as Pies and Prejudice . comics ( YU+ME: dream ) and films ( Good Will Hunting ). The Japanese anime Speed Racer 's original title, Mach GoGoGo! refers to the English word itself, the Japanese word for five (the Mach 5 's car number), and the name of the show's main character, Go Mifune. This is also an example of a multilingual pun, full understanding of which requires knowledge of more than language on the part of the listener.



Names of characters also often carry puns, such as Ash Ketchum and Goku ("kakarot"), the protagonists of the anime series Pokemon and Dragonball . respectively, both franchises which are known for including second meanings in the names of many of their characters. A recurring motif in the Austin Powers films repeatedly puns on names which suggest male genitalia. In the science fiction television series Star Trek . "B-4 " is used as the name of one of four androids models constructed "before" the android Data. a main character.



The parallel sequel The Lion King 1? advertised with the phrase "You haven't seen the 1/2 of it!". Wyborowa Vodka employed the slogan "Enjoyed for centuries straight", while Northern Telecom used "Technology the world calls on." [ 21 ]



Confusion and alternative uses [ edit ]



There exist subtle differences between paronomasia and other literary techniques, such as the double entendre. While puns are often simple wordplay for comedic or rhetorical effect, a double entendre alludes to a second meaning which is not contained within the statement or phrase itself, often one which purposefully disguises the second meaning. As both exploit the use of intentional double meanings, puns can sometimes be double entendres, and vice versa. Puns also bear similarities with paraprosdokian. syllepsis and eggcorns. In addition, homographic puns are sometimes compared to the stylistic device antanaclasis. and homophonic puns to polyptoton. Puns can be used as a type of mnemonic device to enhance comprehension in an educational setting. Used discreetly, puns can effectively reinforce content and aid in the retention of material.



Science and computing [ edit ]



Scientific puns rely on the contrast between precise technical and imprecise informal definitions of the same word. In statistical contexts, for example, the word significant is usually assumed to mean "statistically significant ", which has a precisely defined technical meaning. Using significant with the layperson meaning "of practical significance" in such contexts would qualify as punning, such as the webcomic xkcd ' s pun "statistically significant other ". [ 24 ]



In formal linguistics. puns can often be found embedded within the etymological meaning or usage of words, which in turn may be buried over time and unknown to native speakers. Puns may also be found in syntax. where morphological constructions have derived from what may have originally been humorous word play, slang, or otherwise idiosyncratic word usage.



In computing. esoteric programming languages (EPLs) are based in or contain what may be regarded as conceptual puns, as they typically misuse common programming concepts in ways which are absurd, or functionally useless. Some EPL puns may be obvious, such as in the usage of text images. while other puns are highly conceptual and understandable to experts only.



In computer science. the term type punning refers to a programming technique that subverts or circumvents the type system of a programming language. by allowing a value of a certain type to be manipulated as a value of a different type. For instance, a four-byte integer may be 'cast' as a floating point value; or an instance of class Dog may be treated as a member of a superclass Animal by 'casting' the dog instance as a (more generic) animal.



History [ edit ]



Puns were found in ancient Egypt, where they were heavily used in development of myths and interpretation of dreams. [ 25 ]



In China, Shen Tao (ca. 300 BC) used "shih", meaning "power", and "shih", meaning "position" to say that a king has power because of his position as king. [ 26 ]



In ancient Iraq, about 2500 BC, punning was used by scribes to represent words in cuneiform. [ 27 ]



The Maya are known for having used puns in their hieroglyphic writing, and for using them in their modern languages. [ 28 ]



In Japan, "graphomania" was one type of pun. [ 29 ]



In Tamil Sledai is the word used to mean pun in which a word with two different meanings. This is also classified as a poetry style in ancient Tamil literature.



Really Bad Puns



Subject: Miscellaneous Bad Puns



Q: What do you get when you toss a hand grenade into a kitchen in France?



A: Linoleum blownapart.



A city in Alaska passed a law outlawing all dogs. It became known as Dogless Fairbanks.



Which famous golfer loves to drink wine? Litre Vino.



Archeaologist: a person whose career lies in ruins.



Q: What's the difference between an angry circus owner and a Roman barber?



A: One is a raving showman, and the other is a shaving Roman.



In ancient Rome, deli workers were told that they could eat anything they wanted during the lunch hour. Anything, that is except the smoked salmon. Thus were created the world's first anti-lox breaks.



A ship carrying a cargo of red paint collided with a ship carrying a cargo of purple paint. Both crews were marooned.



Why did the Zen master refuse novocaine when he had his tooth pulled? He wanted to transcend dental medication.



Did you hear about the two men from the monastery who opened a fast-food seafood restaurant? One was the fish friar, the other was the chip monk.



A scientist cloned himself but the experiment created a duplicate who used very foul language. As the clone cursed and swore, the scientist finally pushed it out the window, and it fell to its death. Later the scientist was arrested for making an obscene clone fall.



Two Eskimos sitting in a kayak were chilly, but when they lit a fire in the craft it sank -- proving once and for all that you can't have your kayak and heat it, too.



Two boll weevils grew up in South Carolina. One went to Hollywood and became a famous actor. The other stayed behind in the cotton fields and never amounted to much. The second one, naturally, became known as the lesser of two weevils.



A mushroom walks into a bar, sits down and orders a drink. The bartender says, "We don't serve mushrooms here." The mushroom says, "Why. I'm a fun guy!"



A three-legged dog walks into a saloon in the Old West. He sidles up to the bar and announces: "I'm lookin' for the man who shot my paw."



This guy goes into a restaurant for a Christmas breakfast while in his home town for the holidays. After looking over the menu he says, "I'll just have the eggs benedict." His order comes a while later and it's served on a huge fancy chrome plate. He asks the waiter, "What's with the fancy plate?" The waiter replies, "There's no plate like chrome for the hollandaise!"



Very early one morning two birds are sitting at the side of a large puddle of oil. They see a worm on the other side. So. the one flies over and the other one swims through -- which one gets to the worm first? The one who swam, of course, because "Da oily boid gets da woim."



When she told me I was average, she was just being mean.



A neutron goes into a bar and asks the bartender, "How much for a drink?" The bartender replies, "For you, no charge."



Two molecules are walking down the street and they run in to each other. One says to the other, "Are you all right?"



"No, I lost an electron!"



"Are you sure?"



"I'm positive!"



She criticized my apartment, so I knocked her flat.



On the second day of Hanukkah a woman accidentally backed into a menorah. She burned her end at both candles.



Sticks float. They would.



No matter how attractive you may find him/her, never ask a photographer to step into a dark room and see what develops. The answer is almost always in the negative. (Yes, it's a bad pun--enough to make you shutter.)



Habitual punsters should be banished to Noman. (Noman is an island.)



People who tell really bad puns shouldn't just be banished, they should be drawn and quoted.



There was a man who heard that his local newspaper was having a contest to find the worst pun. He searched his letters and his old e-mails for the worst puns he could find, and he finally came up with a list of the ten very worst puns he'd ever heard. He was certain that one his entries would win the contest. Unfortunately for him, no pun in ten did.



The Zen Master and the Hot Dog Vendor



Everyone has probably heard this old joke:



What did the Zen master say to the hot dog vendor?



"Make me one with everything."



But very few people know the whole conversation that took place. Here it is:



A Zen master walked up to a hot dog vendor and said, "Make me one with everything."



So the vendor made a hot dog with the works for the Zen master and told him it would be two bucks. The Zen master gave him a $20 bill, which the vendor promptly put into the cash drawer. The Zen master then asked, "Where's my change?"



The hot dog vendor replied, "Change must come from within."



The Reluctant Vet



A man runs into the vet's office carrying his dog, screaming for help. The vet rushes him back to an examination room and has him put his dog down on the examination table. The vet examines the still, limp body and after a few moments, tells the man that his dog, regrettably, is dead. The man, clearly agitated and not willing to accept this, demands a second opinion.



The vet goes into the back room and comes out with a cat and puts the cat down next to the dog's body. The cat sniffs the body, walks from head to tail, poking and sniffing the dog's body and finally looks at the vet and meows. The vet looks at the man and says, "I'm sorry, but the cat thinks that your dog is dead, too."



The man is still unwilling to accept that his dog is dead. So the vet brings in a black lab, the lab sniffs the body, walks from head to tail, and finally looks at the vet and barks. The vet looks at the man and says, "I'm sorry, but the lab thinks your dog is dead too."



The man, finally resigned to the diagnosis, thanks the vet and asks how much he owes. The vet answers, "$650." "$650 to tell me my dog is dead?" exclaims the man. "Well," the vet replies, "I would only have charged you $50 for my initial diagnosis. The additional $600 was for the cat scan and lab tests."



The Chicken and The Frog



One day a chicken walked into the library. Much to the surprise of the librarian, the chicken marched straight to the checkout desk and started clucking, "Book book book, book book book book book, book book book. "



The librarian, rather surprised, could only stare at the chicken in disbelief. The chicken, undaunted, continued to cluck: "Book book book, book book book book book, book book book. "



After a few moments, the librarian recovered anough wits to reach below the desk, pull out a small book, and hand it to the chicken. The chicken took the book in its beak and walked out of the library. The librarian, out of curiosity, decided to follow.



The chicken walked for several minutes until it reached a small pond. In the middle of the pond sat a frog an a huge lily pad. Much to the amazement of the librarian, the chicken then turned around, and with a quick flick of its head, flung the book out to the lily pad.



The frog hopped eagerly over to the book. As the frog looked at the book, however, a look of disappointment crossed its face, and it began to croak:



"Read it, read it. "



A Night at the Symphony



A prominent orchestra was performing Beethoven's Ninth Symphony. At one point in the final movement of the symphony, there is a long stretch--over 20 minutes--where the bass violins don't play a note. So, rather than just sit there, the section leader suggested that they sneak out of the orchestra and go across the street to the tavern. The other bass players agreed that this was a splendid idea, and a few minutes later, the basses were in the bar, knocking back drinks at a prodigious rate.



This went on for some time, with all the bass players becoming rather inebriated. One of them happened to look down at his watch and exclaimed, "We'd better get back to our seats or we're going to miss our cue!"



"Relax," said the section leader, "I've got it all taken care of. You see, before the performance started tonight I anticipated this problem, so I took a piece of string and I tied the conductor's score shut. He won't be able to turn the pages when he gets to that part. He'll have to stop the orchestra for a few minutes so he can get it untied. We'll have plenty of time!"



The other bass players praised his inventiveness with one final round of drinks. Then they made there way back across the street to the concert hall, and staggered drunkenly to their seats.



Sure enough, about this time the conductor started to have trouble with his score. He tried to fidget with it, hoping he could solve the problem without having to stop the performance. Unfortunately, he couldn't get the pages to turn, and at last he had to stop the orchestra and spend a few minutes untying the string that held the last section of the score bound. The conductor was clearly annoyed and not a little frazzled.



This, of course, did not go unnoticed by the audience. One woman in the crowd remarked to her husband, "That conductor looks upset and rather nervous."



"Of course he's nervous," the husband replied. "It's the bottom of the Ninth, the score is tied, and the basses are loaded."



Relative dating



Relative dating is the science of determining the relative order of past events, without necessarily determining their absolute age. In geology rock or superficial deposits. fossils and lithologies can be used to correlate one stratigraphic column with another. Prior to the discovery of radiometric dating which provided a means of absolute dating in the early 20th century, archaeologists and geologists were largely limited to the use of relative dating techniques to determine the age of geological events.



Though relative dating can only determine the sequential order in which a series of events occurred, not when they occur, it remains a useful technique especially in materials lacking radioactive isotopes. Relative dating by biostratigraphy is the preferred method in paleontology. and is in some respects more accurate (Stanley, 167–69). The Law of Superposition was the summary outcome of 'relative dating' as observed in geology from the 17th century to the early 20th century.



The regular order of occurrence of fossils in rock layers was discovered around 1800 by William Smith. While digging the Somerset Coal Canal in southwest England, he found that fossils were always in the same order in the rock layers. As he continued his job as a surveyor, he found the same patterns across England. He also found that certain animals were in only certain layers and that they were in the same layers all across England. Due to that discovery, Smith was able to recognize the order that the rocks were formed. Sixteen years after his discovery, he published a geological map of England showing the rocks of different geologic time eras.



Name Puns



About



Name Puns refer to a series of images macros with two or more panels in which the first panel presents a celebrity or character captioned with his or her name, followed by a panel containing a pun of the name, editing the image to reflect the joke.



Origin



The earliest known instance of a celebrity name pun image macro appeared on the art message board b3ta [9] on September 8th, 2008. The first panel was a photoshopped image of American actress Reese Witherspoon [8] holding a spoon. The second panel removed the spoon from her hand and was captioned “Reese Withoutaspoon.”



Precursors



Similar practices of “situational photoshopping” has been previously observed as early as in 2003 with Something Awful’s Photoshop Phriday contest Anagrammed Movie Posters. which involved anagramming a well-known movie title and then photoshopping the official poster to fit in with the altered context. This technique was once again iterated through Worth1000’s One Letter Movie Posters contest in 2006. In non-sequitur humor, the celebrity photoshop meme Woll Smoth also takes a similar approach by shrinking the mouth of a celebrity in the shape of an “O” and replacing all vowels in the name with O’s.



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IIn September 2008, the Witherspoon macro began circulating on image sharing sites including Laugh It Out [7]. Lowbird [10] and Demotivate. info. [11] In 2009, a Kanye Interrupts themed image macro was passed around [15] making a similar joke, using a mirror image of the rapper and changing his name to “Kanye East.”



Derivations of these images did not gain notoriety until February 19th, 2012, when Redditor crawsome posted a version featuring Jafar from the 1992 Disney feature film Aladdin to the /r/funny [30] subreddit. Prior to being archived, the post received over 3,100 up votes and 20 comments. The same day, Tumblr user i-am-oregonian [3] reposted the image macro. By April 2012, the post had received more than 65,600 notes. The Jafar instance was reposted on several humor sites including LOLROFLMAO [6]. FunnyJunk [4] and College Humor. [2] More instances can be found on Tumblr under the tags “celebrity pun” [12] or “name puns.” [13] Humor blog Slacktory [16] regularly posts these image macros under the tag “Visual Puns.” Between September and December, collections of celebrity name pun image macros were featured on Smosh [24]. Bored Panda [25]. Pop Hangover [26] and List25. [27] In December 2012, the subreddit /r/NamePuns [28] was created to be a hub site for these image macros. Additionally, the Twitter feed @CelebNamePuns [29] launched that month, gaining nearly 3000 followers as of February 2013.

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